I remember the smell of death, that hung so thick in the air that I was unable to breath with out gaging. The smell of death if you have never smelt such a stink before, is a sent that clings to everything it can grasp a hold of. It will seep into the depths of your mouth and twist its way down your throat, holding it in a vice like grip that makes you unable to breath. Intangles its self with the only clean air in your lungs and it is as if the death becomes you. Its all you smell. All you feel. And curled inside this smell of death was the stench of rotting flesh, slipped neatly between a tinge of blood and there you have the perfect smell to leave your stomach churning and throat tight. After breathing in this cocktail of disgusting flavored scents you start to wonder whats making the smell. Sitting in a dark warehouse, chained to a rushing pipe, you can only hope you're dreaming, and pray to God you don't become part of that smell next....
I woke up in a haze of confusion and cold sweat, another dream. Just like that last one and the one before that. I still have no idea what it means. I'm in agony as I'm walking through the deserted streets. I know where I'm going and even though the pain gnawing at my insides is unbearable, I carry on. Bright light and then I'm standing in front of huge metal doors. I heave the huge doors open and bright light engulfs me once again.
I splashed my face with cold water, in an attempt to wash away the thoughts of this dream. I always woke up before I can see whats behind those huge metal doors. Its been at least four years now that these dreams have cast them selves upon me and left me standing at those doors. I wished to know what these dreams meant. I wanted to know what was waiting for me behind those metal doors.
The silence filled the room as I turned the tap off. When I could stand the empty space no longer, I turned the shower on, glad for its comforting back ground noise, I Quickly rang mum. The phone rang a number of times before going to voice mail, "Hey Mum, Its me. Errm I'm just thinking i might come down to see you at the weekend. I mean its been ages since I've seen you guys and I still have your Christmas presents to give you. Anyways I'm gonna go now. Can you ring or text when you get this. Thanks." I hung up and slowly undressed. It was unlike Mum to ever miss a call. And her phone must be on, as it rang. I stood for a while in the middle of the room considering why she didn't answer. I quickly decided that she probably had not heard the phone and would find my message soon enough.
I stepped into the shower and let the water claim my body. I suddenly heard the creak of the bathroom door. I froze. A loud slam and a huge crack echoed through the house. I kept very still, the water still cascading down on me. I stared at the glass of the shower to afraid to shift my eyes. The glass slowly started shaking. It was a slow steady movement at first but then it grew and grew, it was as if the glass had turned to water. I slowly reached out to touch the glass but the minute my fingertip brushed the glass, It shattered and flew inwards. Shards of glass flew into my naked body. I screamed and fell to the bottom of the shower. When I dared to look up the water running down the plug hole was a deep red colour. I crawled out the shower and reached for my phone, as my fingers found it a sharp shock came flying off it and shot through my hand. I cried out in shock and pain.
I cradled my bleeding hand against my blood covered body. That's when I saw the door. It hung half off its hinges leaning against the door frame, a huge crack ran like a scar up the middle of the door. I grabbed my phone and dialed 999. The phone rang once and then hung up by its self. I threw the phone against the checked tiles of the bathroom floor. I quickly got a huge pack of bandages out the cupboard and did my best to stop my cuts from bleeding. Most of the glass had only scratched me and the glass that was stuck into me I tore out and tightly wrapped bandages around the cut.
In a matter of seconds the white bandages were stained red but I didn't care. As fast as I could I pulled some clothes on and ran out the bathroom. Picking up my phone and knocking the door down on the floor. As I was about to make a dash for the stairs something grabbed my t-shirt and pulled me back. I screamed and kicked the empty space behind me. The invisible force disappeared and I fell to the ground. I felt a huge gash in my side split open even wider. I pulled myself away and as I got to my feet broke into a run down the stairs. Something kicked me hard sending me flying down the stairs. I landed hard and felt all my bones rattle against one another as I hit the floor.
I could hardly muster the energy to stand, I tried to get to my feet but everything was so hard to do. One single movement took twice as much effort as I use to. It was as if I was moving underwater. It hurt to breath. I think the hit of the forth step had broken a rib and the second step had given me a mild concussion.
The sound of footsteps down the stairs, coming towards me, twisted my heart with fear. The only thought then was 'This is it. I'm going to die and there's nothing I can do about it' I made a final attempt to pick my poor excuse for a body up off the floor before falling back down. Helpless. In that moment as I lay bleeding out death on the floor, the heavy curtains were suddenly ripped down, bright light ate up the whole house. When my eyes began to focus to the light, I felt hands grip the sides of my body. This time it was more supporting me than pain, although my wounds did protest to being touched. The invisible force helped me across the cold wooden floor, to the huge window at the center of the house. I winced from the intensity of the light pouring through the huge windows. Everything outside was just white. No houses. No people. Nothing. Then from out the white something emerged. The metal doors from my dreams stood right outside my house.
Even from just setting eyes on them, shivers spread up my spin and chilled my soul. The window suddenly cracked and the shattered pieces of glass flew out into the white abyss the world had become. The hands that held me up, pushed me forward. I knew what I had to do, but now? I was too scared. They pushed harder, a finger slipping under the bandages wrapped around my body. "NO!" I screamed. "Not yet! Please, I'm not ready to see. Just leave me be!" A salted finger slipped into the huge cut in my side and pulled the edges of the cut apart. I screamed in agony. I desperately tried to break free from the forces grip, but I had so little energy it was like an ant trying to free its self from underneath an elephants foot. In tears I felt my body give way and my feet slip from under me. "please," I whispered as metallic blood choked me.
I slipped between places. The pain and hands left me and I drifted. It was strange as If I was floating but I had my eyes closed so I couldn't be sure. The next thing I remember was waking up in a blood soaked back seat of a car. My head was pounding and I was sure I had lost enough blood to fill a petrol station by now. As I slowly lifted my self up, making sure my arms could take the strain, my eyes went fuzzy and all I could see was the metal doors. A shiver brought me back to the car. A sudden sharp pain rushed through my side, I felt my face burn as some one walked past the car. When they had gone out of sight, I wondered why I hadn't asked for help, and did they seen the blood covered car seat?
I got out the car, holding on to the car for support. My eyes flashed white before allowing me to see my surroundings. I suddenly realised I was out side mums house. My head hurt when I tried to think back to what had happened before I woke up... I was at my house, I rang mum and then... something happened. Something bad. and now I'm somehow outside my mothers front door.
Ignoring the pain that was growing worse with every step, I forced myself up the driveway and to the front door. I knocked. As I waited for someone to open the door my eyes did a full sweep of the building. I had this awful feeling that something wasn't right. The plants that hugged the driveway were dying and the curtains were all drawn shut. I knocked again. Why wouldn't anyone answer the door? was this a joke? did anyone hear me knock? I knocked again, harder this time and this time I followed the knock with a shout 'Mum! Its me!' No reply.
I could feel myself getting hotter and my skin felt like it was burning away, dripping off my bones. My side pulsed in pain and I dropped to my knees. I cried out for help but no one came. I lifted my top and saw the bandages dripping with rouge blood. I almost threw up. It wasn't the blood it was the fact I couldn't remember why I was bleeding or why i was here. after spitting out red slime over the drive, I looked up to see huge metal gates standing it the middle of the road.
I couldn't remember much but one thing I could was that I should stay away from the gates. I slowly picked myself up and tried to limp away as fast as I could. But something stopped me dead in my tracks. a song. My blood ran cold out of my cuts. An old crackling joined sound of melodys. the type of song that seems suited to be played from a gramophone. A song that was played when I was a child.
I turned to look at the gates. I wanted so badly to see what was behind them. I knew all the answers I wanted would be waiting for me behind those gates. I slowly edged closer to them. A familiar presence seemed to follow me. I shivered. The song grew louder as I got closer to the gates. As I reached the gates the music seemed to fade and a sudden emotion grasped my hand, filling my eyes with tears. I slowly ran my fingertips up the cold metal of the door, its rust nipping at my flesh. I slowly smiled. I was ready. I was finally ready for this. I gripped the freezing metal handles in my blood stained hands. I pulled hard on the doors and they glided open. A bright white light consumed me and my pain faded from my wreak of a body.
I awoke to a thousand needles being pushed under my skin. I screamed and pulled my self away. It was pitch black and the only company I heard was a slowly dripping tap. my skin was soaking wet and I wasn't sure if it was sweat or blood. As I moved, my body tore into its self, my lungs screamed in pain as I inhaled. A disgusting smell had seeped into my mouth and left a bitter taste making my eyes water. Everything hurt and It was so difficult to move. I shifted my foot and was met by the sound of metal clanking against stone. I searched in the darkness for the source of the sound. I found a cold metal chain clasped around my ankle. I gasped, taking in more toxic air. I coughed it back out and tried to find the end of the chain.
When in the dark against your will you realise what its truly like for blind people. With no sense of your surrounding you find your self jumping at the smallest things. You can only go on touch and sound. If something feels like stone you can't be sure it is but you also can't just check with your sight, as you have none.
My hands found a huge pipe that ran up the wall. It was metal and possibly painted as something chipped off if you ran your fingers up the metal. the chain around my leg was bound to the pipe and also bound me to the room I was in. I sat slumped against the wall for God knows how long. I didn't know what to do. I was to afraid to shout, in case something in the dark disliked my cries for help. The smell had begun to take its tole and I was on the verge of throwing up. My whole body was burning in agony but I couldn't do a damn thing about it. My clothes were torn and tattered and my skin was coated in a think layer of blood. The constant drip of the tap was driving me crazy and the echo of the sound made me think I was in a huge empty room.
As I argued about the room size in my head a whisper of a cough made me jump. I waited for a few seconds in the dark. After a while I started to think maybe I had coughed and not realised I had. Then out of the silence, another quiet cough. I was quick to act and coughed back. My cough had not meant to be loud but the smell choked it out of me. There was a few minutes silence when I was beginning to think I had imaged the cough a small voice cut through the silence. 'hello, is there anyone else in here?' A croaky yet familiar voice said. 'yes!' I coughed. I heard the slight sound of weeping. 'thank God' the voice choked through gulps of air. Although it hurt to talk, this person sounded like they needed help and I wasn't exactly doing okay either.
We Talked for what must have been two hours or so, he told me he was in alot of pain and he couldn't move his body anymore. I asked how he had got here and just like me, he had no idea. The world seemed a blur to both of us. A sudden crash put our conversation to a halt. We waited in the dark silence. I felt my stomach churn and sickness spread through me. A click and then a buzzing. I slid up the wall, getting to my feet, my head was spinning and my stomach felt like it was being ripped apart. The buzzing got louder and louder. There was a cry of pain from out of the darkness. I screamed, my heart felt like it had burst open through my chest and was pouring my soul onto the stone below me. Silence.
A sudden cry made my quivering body jump. 'I love you!' and then there was silence. My heart felt like it had been stamped on and cut open. A was crying floods of red tears. The lights snapped on. A white light engulfed me and made me drop to my knees. My bleeding heart thumping against my broken ribs. I tried to look through the light. I was in a warehouse. A huge warehouse. Then next thing I noticed was things hanging from the rusting iron beams that ran across the building. Then I realised what was hanging from the celling. I coughed up a vile mix of blood, spit and bail. I know understood why mums phone had not been answered and why no one was at the family house. The answer if your wondering was hanging a feet above my head on a thick rope, covered in blood. And now you also know what the smell was.
The last thing I noticed was a body in the center of the warehouse. familiar blond hair stained with blood. Two beautifully still blue eyes stared at me. I stood for so long looking at him, lying in a pool of crimson blood. For what had been an two hours or so, I had been talking to him. I never once realised. I never even asked his name. If I had, maybe I would have realised. I did wonder why his voice was familiar.
The last thing I did was crawl to his limp body and embrace him in my bloody arms. I cried into his blood soaked hair and kissed his dry, pale lips. The presence was behind me again. 'so its my time now!' I shouted. 'I'm not scared, I mean what have I got left now, you took everything and left me like this.' My heart surged, I screamed. I got to my feet. My chain clashed against the stone sending out magnesium sparks. 'I'm ready!' I growled. 'hit me! kill me! like you killed them!' I looked down at my lost lover. 'I love you too' I whispered.
A huge force, hit into me. It was like a train crashing into me. It snapped my body with one hit and sent me flying into a hard metal wall. My body fell to the floor, twisted and broken like that of a rag doll. Hand outstretched towards the young man who lay in the middle of the floor. Among the shattered insides of my body, if you dig beneath the pieces of bone that slice up out of my flesh, past the blood gushing out of my now ripped open wounds, nestled between a pair of worn out punctured lungs, you will find a broken heart. The impact of wall or the presence didn't get me before the death of a lover in the dark did. My heart bled for him as I lay entwined in the chaos of this life...
PandaPooh
xXx
dark angles, stupid posts, words to touch the soul and me Little Pandaa
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